We've been treading water. Trying desperately to keep our heads above a sea of anger and frustration and self-blame. A sea that has since swiped up our little girl from a shallow and sandy perch, dunking her down deep into the dark abyss of the terrible twos. We're struggling along the fine lines of when and how to discipline. Defining those things considered unacceptable.We are not natural swimmers. And sometimes it feels as though we're drowning. Other days feel like today...
When early mornings start earlier than normal. The night sky, still deep and dark and quiet.Our sleep disturbed by the soft cries of our teething babe. She snuggles up, desperate to find the sweet spot between our pillows and in my arms. And it's okay.
Mornings when the only thing on my mind is driving the seven odd blocks in anticipation of the look on this little girl's face when I come through the front door. When I get an unexplained feeling deep down in my gut- I just need to be near her. Mornings when my heart longs for words of affirmation. Of hope. And courage. Reminding me that this stage is only a phase and as my father used to preach, This too, shall pass. And it's so true.
As she sits deep in suds, morning sun spilling onto the bathroom floor, I sit deep in thought. Meditating on what I hope to make of today. What I hope to obtain. How I want to love her. I take in each hopeful and perfectly woven sentence of this song, allowing it to speak to my tired heart, reassuring me that this phase is only temporary. Affirming that we are making progress. That with this stage comes growth and communication and a better understanding of who she is and who I've become as a parent.
We're emphasizing please and thank-you, bearing through the sobs and fountains of tears which flow from her big browns. We've learned patience and love. We're learning to give direction and instruction, applauding her in her successes, even when it is only because she managed to eat every piece of unwanted food on her plate.
We take pride in our ritualistic bedtime routine-both parents and lots of love, realizing that no matter how rough our day can be, we can always end them positively. We ask for peace. For patience. For understanding. For self-control. But most of all, we ask that we continue to act with love.