Thursday, January 21, 2010
I cant say that I've had a bad day, but its not good either...while i was on the phone with the doctor i noticed that the background baby Einstein DVD changed to Lady Gaga. when i turned around to see what Lola was up to i noticed that she managed to turn on the stereo and was holding onto the entertainment center, shaking her booty. it made my day. i don't care how awful today gets...my little Lola's got moves!
Monday, January 11, 2010
Yesterday when i was playing with Lola I decided to let go of her to see how well her balance was. Sure enough she stayed standing ALL BY HERSELF!!!! I can't believe how fast she has grown! It seems like just yesterday she was only a ball of love, granted she is still my ball of love, just a big, plumper version! She has so much personality and her eyes are full of life! I really feel like she has the ability to melt people's hearts. I must say that I love when I hear other people mention that she is so cute. Does it make me self absorbed or "Lola absorbed"??? Either way, she is great and almost a walker....watch out little boys...Lola is a looker!!!
Thursday, January 07, 2010
Lately I have been feeling the need to be responsible. I don't know what it is about being a mother- maybe it's the guilty feeling of making selfish decisions. I came the the realization just the other day that "my life" is no longer "my life". My life is now Lola. Every decision I make in some way will effect her. I had been throwing the option of being a vegetarian around for a while and you know what, I'm so glad that i made that decision because i feel so much better. i have been doing yoga while Lola naps and it's great meditation time. It's great "me" time. I think Lola deserves to have a healthy, sane, well educated mom who is proud to be who she is. I can honestly say that lately I haven't been feeling so proud. I've been feeling like a twenty-something-degree less mom, but I am more than that! I need to embrace my flaws and enhance the qualities that make me who I am. Today, as Lola was napping i decided to lie down myself. I was having a hard time sleeping because once again I started thinking about what kind of mom example I want to be for my daughter. I have been thinking a lot about savings and Lola's future- any responsible moms thoughts, right?- when i just became overwhelmed with the thought of my past due student loan payments. I began to think about myself, when applying for colleges. i began to think about how hard it was to even go one year to a private school for the mere fact that I needed a co-signer and my parents didn't want to do it. I began to think about Lola and her future and how i want her to get an education and follow her dreams and prosper. So I ignored my well deserved nap time and called my student loan company. As i began to dial the number my heart started beating in my head. You all know the sound I am talking about, you know, the one that makes your head hot and fuzzy feeling all at the same time. I sat there, in front of the computer and said out loud, "Take a deep breath, everything is going to be fine". Sure enough, it was. I know have the satisfaction of knowing that money may be a little tight, but I'm doing it for Lola. She deserves the world, and I'll do anything to help her achieve that.
Tuesday, January 05, 2010
Now that today is almost over, it will mark the completion of my first official day as a vegetarian. I have been wanting to go back "to the dark side" as Pieter might put it, for a while now but have been struggling to get a good start on it. So i decided that instead of declaring that i am now a vegetarian I will simply just take it one day at a time. My approach will be simple and similar to quitting smoking-although the last time i quit smoking was when i found out i was pregnant and I'm happy to say that i haven't smoked since- so maybe it's not really like quitting smoking, but you know what I mean!!! I tried to make yesterday my first official day, but quickly caved when I got to my works dinner party....I'm a sucker for Mexican food! I have also made Lola's second nap my yoga relaxation time! I successfully did it today without feeling like throwing up and feel more flexible already! I'll keep y'all posted on how it goes!